What A Man

It’s been 2 days since Doug and I decided to give a relationship a try.  I’ve been insanely giddy and happy.  I can tell he’s happy too.

I know this doesn’t solve my depression issues but I am hoping I can put myself in the right frame of mind to explore my thoughts, feelings and behaviors.  I know Doug will be there for me.

I am, however, excited to see what the future brings.  I’ve always felt that Doug and I were practically made for each other.  Since we decided to give this a go, he’s been kinder, sweeter and definitely more attentive.  We talk so much more than we used to and he actually pays attention to what I’m saying.  For example, today I got my tax info so I could finally file.  I sent Doug a picture of my W2 and told him I was doing a happy dance.  Previously, he would have just said, “Cool.”  Now, he said, “I did too! lol”

I’ll be down to see him next week.  Where we have already said we’re going to “seal the deal”.  We’ve had a strange friendship for the last few months but now, we’re more.  I’m scared, anxious, and excited, all at once.  My stomach is getting butterflies just thinking about it.  I’ve waited so long to touch him.

Just a funny quip to throw in here.  Well, I thought it was funny.  The other night when we were talking on the phone, he said, “Oh, now that I’m your boyfriend, there’s something I need to fix.”  I said, “Fix what?”  He said, “I’m going to get you a gun.”  Apparently, being a woman who travels alone and stuff, he’s always insisted that I needed to get myself protection.  I’ve never owned a gun before and I’ve never been in a position where I needed one.  So I’ve always told him I didn’t need to get one.  So I said to him, “I’ve told you before, I don’t need one.”  He said, “You do and I’m going to make sure you have that protection.”  So, I resigned to him and said, “If it’ll make you feel better, I’ll do it for you.”  He said, “Good.  No girl of mine is gonna be in danger and not have a way to protect herself if I’m not there.”

What a man.